Forever Ours

As of Friday, June 17, 2011, Garon is legally our son. We are forever grateful that God chose us to be his parents and we are humbled by His perfect plan for bringing him to us. We are also very grateful to everyone who made it possible for us - financially, emotionally, physically and spiritually - to embark on this amazing adoption journey. As I sat in church this morning, I thought how miraculous it is that we are his family and that without God's intervention he most likely would not have been in church this morning. I believe God has a very special plan for his life and I'm honored to be a part of it.

When our attorney's office called Wednesday the 15th to see if we could finalize two days later, we were shocked. We never dreamed the chancellor could see us so quickly. Adoption hearings are considered ex parte and cases are heard on a first come, first serve basis. So, we arrived at 8:00 hoping to be one of the first cases. Our attorney came out of the office and said we were first...we were so excited!!!! We went back to the chancellor's chambers, were sworn in and he signed the order stating that we are his forever parents and legally changing his name to the name we have given him. His signing the order seemed so simple compared to all we've been through over the past 15 months.

The entire day was wonderful - it really was one the best days ever. Our families and our social worker were able to be at the hearing with us making the day even more special. And Garon was absolutely perfect the entire time. We are so proud of him and the person he will become. People keep telling us how lucky & blessed he is - but I feel it's we who are blessed. He has forever changed us and we love him more each day. I'm not sure when it happened but his life has become vital to mine. I just don't think my heart would beat without him.

Baby boy, you are more loved than you can know!!

"'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the LORD, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.'" Jeremiah 29:11

The Best 6 Months of My Life

As I sit here holding my sweet boy, I can’t believe he will be 6 months old Friday! It seems so impossible!!! I keep asking myself what happened to the tiny newborn he once was. He is now my sitting, baby food-eating, spitting, laughing, noise-making, cooing, talking, playing, rolling, wiggling, scooting baby boy. He has changed so much over the past few weeks and has really come out of shell. He is constantly making a noise of some kind and he finds it quite entertaining. I took him to the doctor last week for a cold and he weighed 16 lbs. 7 oz. and was 25 inches long. He has grown so much and has the cutest chubby baby legs ever!

June is a very special month for several reasons. Not only will Garon be 6 months old, but Granna has a birthday, Jason will have his very first Father’s Day, and we get to finalize the adoption! Everything is complete - we are just waiting for a hearing date with the judge. It seems so strange that a year ago we didn’t even know about Garon and now we have come to the point where a judge will declare him forever-legally ours! There are no words to express how I feel about that. However, most of the time I forget that he isn’t legally ours yet. It’s kinda weird…we’ve cared for this little person for 6 months while the adoption agency actually has custody of him. I have come to think of myself as his Mama now. It was hard for me to stop thinking of his birthmother as his mom. I don’t know why since she doesn’t live anywhere near us. I have no idea if that’s normal or not! But that feeling has faded.

Please pray for our family as we prepare for the final step in the adoption process and as we continue on our journey as a family of three. We are blessed beyond anything we ever hoped for!

Here are some recent pictures of our baby boy! We are completely smitten with him!

Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see. Hebrews 11:1

The Fragrance of Worship

Those who know me well, know that I’m an avid reader. I love a great story whether fiction or non-fiction, religious or secular. I recently read I Will Carry You by Angie Smith (an eloquently written story of finding joy through grief). In this book she weaves the story of Lazarus in with the story of her daughter, Audrey. Her re-telling of the story of Lazarus opened my eyes and my heart to completely new aspects faith, worship and how much we are truly loved by the Savior who gave His life so we could spend eternity with Him. Anyway…if you tend to get weepy, get a Kleenex handy!

Disclaimer: I can’t tell the story as well as she did!!!

First of all, I encourage you to go back and read the story of Lazarus in the Bible which can be found in John 11 & 12.

Ok…now that you’re back! Let’s dig in!!!

For a little time perspective, these events take place shortly before the Triumphal Entry (when Jesus presents Himself as The King of the Jews – fulfilled on the exact date prophesied in Daniel 9:25 – which is a story for another time). He was crucified less than a week later.

When Mary & Martha sent the message to Jesus regarding Lazarus’ illness, the message simply said: “Lord, behold, he whom you love is sick.” There is so much faith in this simple statement. First of all they addressed Jesus as “Lord” which lets us know that they know He is the Son of God. And that is followed by “he whom you love is sick.” They didn’t say the one who loves you or tell Jesus it was Lazarus. This indicates they knew Jesus would know exactly of whom they were speaking. And they knew Jesus loved Lazarus. And the statement was just that – a statement. There were no specific requests. Their faith in Jesus was that He would know what to do with the information with which they provided Him. We so often give God a laundry list of things we want Him to do to solve our problem – regardless of what that problem is. I don’t think I have ever just told God the problem and just sat back and waited to see what He would do. I always have various solutions and I tell Him what I would like for Him to do to fix it!!! I know I was very guilty of this with our adoption. I poured out my heart to God all the things I wished for our child. I do believe God cares what is in our hearts whether it is faith or doubt. He knows our human nature and loves us as we are. But He also knows what is best for us without our help. And yes, God answered so many of the prayers I had prayed but He also answered ones I didn’t know to pray for. And that’s what Jesus did here with Mary and Martha’s request – they just couldn’t see it yet.

When Jesus received their message he waited two days before leaving where He was to go to Judea – where they were. In John 11:4 Jesus said “…This illness does not lead to death. It is for the glory of God, so that the Son of God may be glorified through it.” When Jesus arrived at the gate of the city He already knew Lazarus had died. Both Mary and Martha greeted Jesus (separately) with tears telling Him that if He had been there sooner Lazarus would still be alive. But they also told Him they still believed that the Father would do anything He asked of Him. Jesus said to Martha in John 11:25-26 “…I am the resurrection and the life. Whoever believes in me, though he die, yet shall he live, and everyone who lives and believes in me shall never die…” When Mary comes to Jesus and He sees her tears and the tears of the Jews who were present, He weeps. He was not crying because Lazarus was dead - He knew he would be resurrected shortly. He was greatly saddened by the fact that they couldn’t know what He knew. He was sad because of our separation from Him. But in just a few days, He would be crucified and bear our sin so that sin would no longer separate us from Him.

When they reached the tomb, Jesus instructed them to roll the stone away from the tomb. But Martha told Jesus there would be an odor because Lazarus had been dead for four days. Then in verse 40 “Jesus said to her, ‘Did I not tell you that if you believed you would see the glory of God?’” How often to we offer excuses not to be obedient and roll the stone away because we are afraid of the “odor” beyond the stone? And by not doing so we miss out on seeing “the glory of God.” But they followed Jesus’ command and rolled the stone away. And in order that those present would believe that He was the Son of God, he commanded Lazarus to come out of the tomb…and he did!!! And everyone present saw “the glory of God.”

In John 12:1-8, they gave a dinner for Jesus following Lazarus’ resurrection. This is six days before Passover (Jesus was crucified on Passover). Martha served the dinner while Mary anointed Jesus’ feet with oil. John 12:3 reads “Mary therefore took a pound of expensive ointment made from pure nard, and anointed the feet of Jesus and wiped his feet with her hair. The house was filled with the fragrance of the perfume.” At a time when women were not allowed to show their hair in front of men, Mary took her hair down and wiped the feet of her Savior with her hair. She laid it all on the altar for Him. Her actions were not of disrespect but of pure worship. He had raised her brother from the dead and she was simply worshiping Him for who He is. And the house was filled with the fragrance of her worship.

A pound of perfume is A LOT. Our perfume bottles today are measured in fluid ounces. Can you imagine how strong the fragrance would be if you broke one of your perfume bottles in your house? The perfumes in Jesus’ time were especially strong (and very expensive – the perfume Mary used could have been sold for 300 denarii) because people did not bathe daily like we do. The fragrance would last several days and a little would go a long way. Nevertheless, Mary used a pound of perfume. Judas admonished Mary for being wasteful with the expensive perfume. But Jesus told him to leave her alone so that she could keep the remaining oil for his burial.

The following day Jesus rode into Jerusalem on a donkey – The Triumphal Entry. When He rode into town He carried the scent of her worship. When He was crucified a few days later, He was still carrying the scent of her worship. When Mary visited with family and friends following Jesus’ death, she also carried the scent of her worship in her hair. Everywhere she went the fragrance was with her. As she mourned her Savior, the fragrance of her worship surrounded her. Do we carry the fragrance of our worship with us? Do others see evidence of us having been with our Savior? Do we carry that fragrance in good times and in bad? Sometimes we have to roll the stone away to see “the glory of God.” I have truly seen “the glory of God” in the gift of my son. I hope each time you roll your stones away you will see His glory as well!

“He is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us.” Ephesians 3:20